Hey, kids. It’s been a minute. I’ve also been overloaded and under the weather. Crymsyn and I had a fantastic time at SC Horror, but I also came home with a lovely case of Covid, which means I’ve been pretty useless the last two weeks. HOWEVER… we’re back in action today and onto a little bit of a touchy subject. It’s been on my mind for awhile now.
The idea of giving up.
I don’t mean that in a final “don’t want to be here” kind of way — not at all. What I mean specifically is giving up on our dreams. Things we love. The world is a pretty scary place right now and most of us are caught in the rat race of making ends meet. It leaves very little time for the things we love when all we really want to do is escape into our hobbies. I’m assuming that since you’re here, you’re either a reader or a writer, which means you understand the absolute agony that comes with having to put down your book and go <insert un-fun activity here>.
That’s also sort of where I am with writing. Don’t worry… I have no intentions of ACTUALLY doing it. But every now and then I have that thought: “I should just take it all down and walk away to save myself the heartache.” There are always easy reasons why we should put down the things we love and walk away. Excuses to stop when it gets touch are simple to manufacture. More often than not, we are our own worst enemies while pretending we’re self-preserving.
I have a lot of big decisions to make in my writing career right now. I have to figure out what parts are working and which parts no longer serve me. Then I have to actually do something about them. Oftentimes, I manage to find myself in sticky situations that require more finesse than my big ol’ neurodivergent brain is capable of using. I’m also highly conflict-averse, so I find myself thinking it’s easier to just walk away than fight the battle head-on.
Hence, the desire to give up.
It’s a strange place to be. And I know there are a lot of people out there thinking just like me — just put it down and walk away from it, no matter how much you love it. You can find something else to fill the hole.
We can do that, yes. But you know what? If we do, we’ll end up regretting it. That thing we love? Nothing else can fill that void the way it does. So just like with every other disappointing part of life, we just have to keep reminding ourselves that this, too, will pass. It’s okay to put it down and take a break, to walk away and do something else. But come back to it.
And bring a cup of coffee when you come back. The caffeine will help.